The People We Used to Be Vs. The People We Are Now

I know that I have talked about making changes. Here, I want to talk about that, but it is slightly different this time around. This time I am talking about people who change. I have been doing a lot of self reflection these days (I am not sure if it is because Demi talked about it in her book or that I have just been thinking about it a lot). One of the things I have been thinking about is how I have changed from the person I used to be to the person that I am now in the present moment. It does not matter if I have changed from a year ago, a month ago, even last week. The point is that I am noticing the changes in myself and I know that some people are probably noticing as well (although it should not matter because I have said before, it is about me not them). I have gone through things that have changed me as a person. I know some of those things can be characterized as “bad” or “negative,” but some of those things turned out to be good and positive.

I am making these changes on a constant basis (and I am still going through changes to this very day). I am turning from the person I used to be to the person that I am now. Other people are going through the same thing as well. In a sense, we are saying goodbye to the person we used to be and saying hello to the new us. That does not mean we should totally forget about the people we used to be (after all, they can still teach us valuable lessons). It just means we are improving to be better human beings. So do not let others judge you for the person you used to be (I am trying to do the same thing). Like I have said before, they do not always know the real you (they just think they do). I will also say (as a reminder) that if you do change, remember to make those changes for yourself and not for others.

This poem is written about myself (and the person I used to be), but I know that others can relate to this subject topic as well. Hang in there because I know that we have all had (or still have) bad days or darkness come into our lives. I have to admit that I have been through those dark and bad days (I am not spilling all my deep and dark secrets though because they are next to my heart). As Demi said in her book, celebrate and embrace those changes (she also says to reflect on how you have changed over the course of the year). I have always said (and I will say the same thing to others) that we are still living. I also remember someone saying to always put one foot in front of the other. This poem is for my readers and to remind them that we are not always the same person we used to be. Cheers!!

Who I Used To Be

I used to be a dreamer,

Thinking about the

Daunting future.

I used to wonder what it

Would be like to sleep with

The moon and the stars

Late at night. Do not tell them

My secrets, the ones I keep close.

They are the one I will have

Until I die. Do not tell them that

I keep things to myself as

I feel like nobody will believe me.

Do not tell them it feels like

I have seen better days.

All they see is the spring in

My steps and my voice full

Of merriment. They do not know

That it feels like I am drowning

In complete darkness. They do

Not need to know that I struggle

To let the light in. They do not

Need to know that I used to be

A seeker, who would go after

Everything and anything

That made me feel

Less alone in this world.

Do not tell them that I used

To be afraid of having nobody.

They do not need to know

That I used to hold on tight

And count until the breathing

Became easier. They do not

Need to know that I used to

Feel like I was suffocating.

All they need to know is that

I am trying to be a better person

Because of all of that. They should

Know that I am above all of that.

They should pay no attention to

The person I used to be before

Things were going good.

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Elena

I was born and raised in the Bay Area. Growing up, I went to Berkeley public schools up until I left California to attend McDaniel College, located in Westminster, MD. I graduated from McDaniel College with a B.A. in Theatre Arts with a focus in Acting.

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