Tag: messy ties

Girl Power

I know it has already been a month and even longer than that at this point that I have last posted something. My apologies for that. I am going to dive right into this post. This month is Women’s History Month. I wish we did not have to get a month out of the whole year because we should be celebrating women every single day of the year. Without women none of us would be here. I am proud to come from a strong line of women, especially my mom, who in my eyes is the very definition of a strong woman. She amazes me every single day. Without her I would not be here in this world. This post is not just about me, but about the women who came before me as well as the girls/women who will come after me. I want to start off with a quote by Amy Sherman-Palladino who says “Girl power in my mind is to let girls be exactly what they are. Let them be angry. Let them be resentful. And rebellious. Let them be hard and soft and loving and sad and silly. Let them be wrong. Let them be right. Let them be everything. because, they are everything.” In other words, girl power is all about letting them be who they truly want to be.

At the end of the day… girl power is all about women supporting women because often we get knocked down and tear each other apart. That is the most hurtful thing we can do because from the moment we are born we are pitted against each other and are taught that everything is a competition. Life is not a competition and that is a fact. That leads me to my next quote. “A strong woman is someone who raises other women up instead of tearing them down.” In other words the embodiment of a strong woman is one who lifts other women up instead of tearing them down. Here is one final quote and this one is from my favorite tennis player. Serena Williams says “Every woman’s success should be an inspiration to another, we’re strongest when we cheer each other on.” In other words, we should be everyone’s cheerleader, especially when they have success. I could go on and on about this subject but I will conclude here. This post and poem goes out to all the women I have come across in my lifetime, from my mom, to my sister, aunts, cousins, friends, co-workers, and even strangers who have showed me what a strong and successful woman looks like. This one is for you and I love every single one of you!

Girl Power

My dear, I see the pain and suffering in your eyes,
But you are the movers and shakers of the world.
You are the reason why I have the blood running in
My strong veins. Your pain is my pain and the guys?
They do not know what it is like to hold the curled
Words and watch them disappear into thick skin

So no one else sees their wounds. You are a warrior
And goddess no one else can ever become. Through
And through you are tough like leather. Like a star
You shine. You are becoming a healer and worrier
Because that is what the generations before you
Carried with them on their backs. You may be far

From the womb where you originally came from
And the shoulders you once were carried upon, but
You are never far from the heart and the feet that
Carried you up the stairs. You are never like a crumb
That people can forget about because you are what
People call strong like the sun. You are never the flat

Corners of the earth because they are non-existent.
You are the gold in the mines. You are the flames of
The fire burning bright and like the beacon of hope
You are what this world needs now, a persistent
Presence that is not going anywhere. You are loved,
Do not forget that. There are days when the ropes

And your eyes are going to become way too heavy.
You are the little girl and the woman who never gave
Up, so keep swinging and keep fighting for what your
Ancestors fought for as they repaired a broken levee
Not for you or anyone to destroy, but for you to pave
The way. My dear, you are opening your own door.

Love That Destroyed Us

You know the feeling of falling in love? It is exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. It sometimes has the power and ability to destroy us. That is the type of love I will be talking about in this post. Love is a dangerous thing. That brings me to my first quote of this post. “Love is a dangerous weapon; it can either heal you or destroy you completely.” So in other words, love can either help and heal you or it can destroy and break you. It is one thing or another, not both. If you are lucky you will find someone who has the power to destroy you, but does not do so in the end. Hang onto that person because they are one of a kind. We all want to hurt someone, especially when they hurt or try to destroy you. They either do it accidentally or on purpose. The mature thing is to just walk away because as much as you want to hurt or destroy someone who did the same to you it is better to take the higher road. That leads me into my next quote. “Maturity is when you have the power to destroy someone who did you wrong, but you breathe, walk away, and let life take care of them.” In other words, it is better to let karma do its work.

This is going to be a short post, so I will conclude with one final quote and that will be it for this post. There is a reason why some relationships fail while others do not. That leads me into my final couple of quotes of this post. “Most relationships tend to fail. Not because of absence of love. Love is always present. It’s just that one loves too much and the other loves too little.” In the end, that is why love can destroy us. There is one more quote to wrap things up here. Anna Todd says “When you love people, you don’t let them destroy you along with themselves, you don’t allow them to drag you through the mud. You try to help them, try to save them, but the moment that your love is one-sided or selfish, if you keep trying, you are a fool.” I think that quote is self explanatory and sums up what this post is all about. I hope you enjoy the following poem which won me a competition I participated in on DUP.

Love as a One-Way Street

We were like embers in the night sky
Burning bright only for us to see, but
How is it that our signals got tangled?
In hindsight you were the wrong guy
For I wanted to get you out of the rut
You were stuck in while you handled

Me like a dynamite stick… too damn
Cautious and shut down a possibility
To rekindle what we lost in the fire.
You wanted to move on as I slammed
The door closed. I take no responsibility
For your happiness as I have no desire

To love someone who stopped loving
Me in return. You got your wish for
Me to stop trying. You may think this
Was all a game or that I was bluffing
Or that I was trying to even the score,
But the truth is that you lost and missed

Every chance. Our love was like a one-
Way street. I had to walk away with my
Head held high and with my love you
Destroyed because even with the sun
In my generous heart I could never try
To hurt yours that remains forever blue.


Forgiveness

I know that this is something I have talked about before… forgiveness. It is such a tricky thing to navigate, but it is something that is important to discuss. Forgiveness is about forgiving others and sometimes it is about forgiving yourself. A lot of the time it is forgiving yourself and others at the same time. That brings me to my first quote of this post. Morrie Schwartz says “Learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others.” As we start the new year this is what I think about because in order to move on into a new season/new year forgiveness is a big part of moving on. We do not necessarily have to forgive in order to move on, but forgiveness is something that is important if we want to let go of the things that are hurting us. Even if the other person is not sorry we should learn to forgive them anyways, but like I just said forgiveness is not necessary in order to move on. I think Taylor Swift says it in the best way. She says “You know, people go on and on about, like, you have to forgive and forget to move past something. No, you don’t. You don’t have to forgive and you don’t have to forget to move on. You can move on without any of those things happening. You just become indifferent, and then you move on.” So in other words you do not necessarily have to forgive people.

Like I said before it is important to forgive yourself as much as it is important to forgive others. That is a huge thing we can all learn in life. Yes, forgiving others is important, but forgiving yourself is more important. We are all imperfect and flawed in some way or another. This brings me to my next quote of this post by D. Muthukrishnan. They say “If you cannot forgive yourself, you cannot forgive others.” In other words, forgiving yourself is important in order to forgive others because if we cannot forgive ourselves then how in the hell can we forgive others? Like I said we are all imperfect and make mistakes. We are only human after all. That concludes this post. I hope you take the time to really digest what forgiveness means to you and enjoy the following poem about forgiveness. Before I conclude this post I will leave you with one final quote. Suzanne Somers says “Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.” So in other words, forgiveness is something you give yourself, not to other people. That concludes this post.

Forgiveness

I am sorry… the words that are dripping
From the mouth that should taste sweet
Like honey, but in the heart they taste like
Blood, full of copper and salt. Do you truly
Mean those simple words or are you tripping
Over false words and promises? Your feet
Carry you to the ocean where you dislike
The waves, but drowning in your newly

Found duty to be honest with yourself and
Those you hurt should mean something.
How can you live with yourself when you
Can feel the flames on your skin? How can
You forgive others when you cannot stand
To forgive yourself? Maybe you are numbing
The pain inflicted by others. Maybe the blue
Parts of your soul heal from the pain you ran

Away from. All you know is that forgiveness
Should not feel like something that hurts as
Much as a bullet to the heart. It should not
Have to be as painful as being in love with
Someone who does not love us or give us
What we need in return which are the paths
To redemption and forgiveness. The knot
May become untangled, but you re-breathe

Life. Forgiveness is never easy, but neither
Is leaving her behind – the girl who used
To never believe in forgiveness or apologies.
Now she wears those words proudly on her skin.
I am sorry. I am sorry. I am sorry. The keeper
Of words that used to be fractured and bruised,
But now they are the words of higher qualities,
A different place than where she used to begin.

Lost and Found

Right off the bat I want to wish everyone a happy new year. May this year be great for everyone. Life is all about lost and found. We constantly lose things, but a lot of the time we gain things too. It may not be exactly like the thing we lost, but a lot of the time it is better. That is what this post is about. It is about things we have lost and gained. That brings me to my first quote of the post. “Remember, for everything you have lost, you have gained something else. Without the dark, you would never see the stars.” So in other words, for everything you have lost you will gain something else. People want to tend to focus on the things they lost instead of looking at the things they gained.

I am personally thankful for the things I have gained and lost because it got me to where I am today. That brings me to my next quote which sums up what this blog post is all about. “What you don’t have, you may gain; what you gain, you may lose; what you lose, you may regain. Life is a cycle of gaining and losing. So appreciate things before you lose them. And have faith that whatever you’ve lost will be replaced. Maybe in a different package, but enough to make you whole again.” In other words, we should be thankful for everything in life that comes and goes. You never know when something will come back to you in a different form. I hope that you all enjoy the poem down below.

P.S. I am going to start something new this year on this blog. To get everyone more involved I am going to start doing polls. I am going to leave it up to my readers what I talk about here. I am going to start off by doing it at least once a month and we will go from there.

Losing Me

I thought that losing you would really hurt me,
But it was when I lost myself, piece by piece
That ended up hurting the most because people
Can come and go, but I could never get another

Me. I know deep down there is no magical key
Or solution to getting rid of every single crease
That built me from scratch. Your loss was lethal
Like a bullet to the heart, but mine was what other

Words could not describe… bottomless and little
Hope to remain intact. Even after the dark and
Gloomy days ended there was a real chance for
Hope, but how can I love after a loss so turbulent?

How can I forget that you left me broken and brittle?
It is when I took a look at my heart beating in my hand
That I realized I could not take that chance for the door
To close and leave me behind. Your loss was permanent,

But I was okay with that because in the end I gained my
Happiness as you had no part in making me happy. You
Had no part in gaining the pieces I thought I lost forever.
You had no part in restoring the old me who was not

Broken. You were not part of the reason I stopped crying.
I lost you, but I gained a new sense of hope and a blue
Sky that had me smiling. I was not whoever or whatever
You wanted me to be because I was no longer a tangled knot.  

Spreading Your Roots

I think I have talked about making BIG changes. I feel like one of the biggest changes I have made as of recently is moving from my hometown of Oakland, CA to Portland, OR. That really has me thinking of this topic I will be talking about in this post. When I think of the meaning of spreading your roots it means to stay in a place where you feel like you found home and spreading your roots/seeds. I think I feel like I am finally starting to find my roots here in Portland. I have been slowly finding my community and feel like it is the place where I want to be for a while.

I have searched for a quote for this post and here is one that I came across. “Spreading your wings doesn’t mean leaving your roots behind; it means embracing the freedom to explore new territories while staying grounded in who you are.” So in other words just because you spread your wings and roots does not mean you forget who you are. It just means you have the freedom and ability to explore new places you have never been to before. In fact it keeps you even more grounded in who you are. Embrace where you come from. And on that note I will stop here. Enjoy the following poem.

Visual poem titled “New Place, New Beginning.” Image copyright by Elena Waller.

Temptation

Just a fair warning to those who read this post. It is going to be a short post because there is so much I could say about this, but I think I will let this poem speak for itself. Temptation… it is never a simple or easy thing/subject to talk about. So I’m just going to share the following poem which got me runner up position for a competition I participated in on DUP. Here you go. Enjoy!

“Temptation” visual poem. Received 2nd place in a competition on DUP.

Revenge

It is a busy time for me so I apologize for not posting anything for a while, but I am back now and let’s dive right in. Let us talk about revenge. Now when people think of revenge they think of something like hurting the person who hurt them because that is what that is the first instinct… to hurt someone who has hurt you. It is kind of like karma or returning the favor. We think of revenge as loud and maybe loud, but honestly the best kind of revenge is quiet. That way the person or people who hurt you do not see it coming. That leads me to my first quote of this post. Pranit Arya says “Sometimes silence is the best revenge.” I have to agree with that one because silence says so much. People expect the worst from you especially when you are hurting and angry, but the best way to get revenge is to stay silent instead of being loud.

The best thing is to never stoop to their level because what they did to you is beneath you and although you want to hurt them you should not really have to. Sometimes they do not mean to hurt you, but sometimes they do it on purpose they have been hurt too. It is just an endless cycle… people who hurt other people. The best revenge is not violence or wanting to hurt that person, but it is to move on, be happy, be yourself and be successful. That leads me to my next and final quote by Alissa Violet who says “The best revenge is no revenge. Move on. Be happy. Find inner peace. Flourish.” In other words do not even bother with revenge because the best revenge is to simply move on and be happy with your life. You deserve that much instead of causing problems and dwelling on people who bring you down. You need to focus on yourself and not others and what they did to you. It is as simple as that. I hope that you all enjoy the following poem.

Sweet Revenge

You wanted her pretty and submissive,
But she was wild and followed her
Own rules. She lived for the danger,
But to you she is sweet and addictive.
It is too bad that she was truly never
Yours because you were only a traitor.

Little did you know that all she wanted
Was revenge and she was dressed for
The kill, never stopping until she gets
What her heart wants. She outsmarted
You in the games and in the endless war.
You think that she would have regrets,

But she has none. She stole your key
To your heart, never to be seen again
As she is driving down the road and out of
Town. Today you might feel freedom,
But tomorrow you will feel her in the rain
And when you least expect her deep love

To seep through the cracks or crevices
She left behind for someone else to
Replace. You may say it is sabotage,
What she did to you, but selflessness
Is what she gave everyone and you
Took advantage of the goodness lodged

In her heart. It may be cold or calculated,
But her revenge mode is activated.

Faded Love

Hi there! I know that I have not posted for quite some time and for that I am sorry. Let’s dive right back in here. I know that I have talked about this subject for quite some time… love. But here I am going to talk about a type of love we do not always typically talk about. Love is not always sunshine or rainbows or flowers. Sometimes there is a type of love that fades away and we cannot always stop it from fading away or disappearing. Sometimes it is as simple as people who do not belong together and you know what… that is perfectly okay. Sometimes love is not that fairy tale or happy ending and this is what this blog post is all about. That brings me to my very first quote by Carolyn Meyer. “What had happened to our love? Somehow it had faded, or worn out, or simply withered away.” Something like love can be simply faded, worn out or withered away and it happens a lot more than we think it does.

This doesn’t always have to be related to love. It can be about anything or anyone in your life that fades away. That leads me to my next quote. “Sometimes you can’t choose what stays and what fades away.” So in other words some things fade and some things stay and you have no control over that. In the end some a lot of things like love simply fade away to make room for something better. That leads me to my next quote by Diego J. Carrillo Díaz who says “One day everything will start fading away and before you know it its all gone for good; making way for new and better things.” So it was like what I was saying before… things fade away to make room for the new and better.

We have to learn how to take care of something as precious as love because if we are not careful it could fade and die. That leads me to my next quote. “Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing.” In other words love does not die naturally and we have to learn how to water it and let it grow. We have to learn to fix our mistakes and betrayal. We have to learn how to heal it and make it better. We have to do all of this because otherwise it will get faded, tarnished and withered.

On the other side of the spectrum nothing is going to be permanent including love and a lot of the time you cannot leave yourself empty handed or leave yourself with nothing when you do decide to leave and let that love fade away. That brings me to my next and final quote. “I have come to realise that nothing is permanent. No matter how much love you claimed you have for someone. It can fade away. Yours, or his. Just make sure when that time comes, you still have something left inside of you to keep you moving forward.” I have always learned this the hard way. Love is not always a permanent thing because even if they love you or you love them it still is something that can fade away over time and one of you still has to walk away with love in your hearts. You have to learn that it is okay to walk away if something does not feel right. Just make sure that you leave yourself with something still left inside of you that keeps you moving forward, not backwards or stuck in place.

I know this is a lot to take in and I was trying to make up for lost time with this lengthy post, but there is still a lot to learn from all of this. Like I said before love is not always a sure, definite or permanent thing and that is okay. It can become faded, especially when we do not take care of it. We have to treat it with care like it is something that is delicate and fragile. Otherwise it can wear and tare over time like anything else in life. Faded love is something we do not have control over. So my readers… I hope you learned something from this. And I hope you enjoy the following poem. Cheers!!

Faded Love

I loved you through it all,
The highs, the lows and
Everything in between but
Even as every single wall
Came down with your hand
In mine perfectly it was what
Tore our love into tiny pieces.
Some love is right there like
A shiny new toy and reaches
The stars but ours is on strike
And sits on an abandoned
Shelf, all alone and collecting
Dust along with the flattened
Sense of hope. It is reflecting
On you, not me as I always
Loved you, but you loved me
Far too late when yesterdays
Fade away into weeks. You see
Me for who I really am months
Too late. By then I have already
Moved to someone who confronts
Everything head on with a steady
Presence instead of waiting in
The shadows and for him to love
Me better than you could on even
Ground. So where did the pieces of
Love go when we both fled the scene?
We walked away with hands finally clean.

Out With the Old/In With the New

It is a new year. Happy 2023 everybody. To kick it off here is my first post of the new year. And I am sure it is a familiar subject for most if not all of you. It is out with the old and in with the new. That means we get rid of the old in order to bring in anything new. That leads me to my very first quote of this post. Eileen Caddy says “Life is full and overflowing with the new. But it is necessary to empty out the old to make room for the new to enter.” In other words we pretty much need to de clutter in order to make room for anything new. So this is the end to this post because although I could go on and on about this subject, but I will stop here.

Out With the Old, In With the New

I say goodbye to all the people and things weigh me down
Because if life taught us anything it is the fact that we do not
Deserve it when our megawatt smiles turn into sullen frowns.

Say goodbye to the things that turn our stomachs into knots
Much like a lasso that does not untangle or come undone.
Sometimes we miss the people we used to know and spots

Where we used to hang out. We are more worthy of the sun,
Moon and stars when we trust the people who give them to us
Instead of questioning their motives. Some days we have spun

Out of control, but we learn to let go of the things we fussed
Or fought over. Much like we shed the things that no longer fit
Us like the clothes and skin we used to wear, we adjust

To the changes and loads we must carry. So as the world sits
And watches just remember to breathe and never quit.

Blessings

Life is always a roller coaster ride, filled with many ups and downs. Sometimes we tend to focus on the bad or negative things. On the flip side we sometimes ignore the good or positive things. Whether it is good or bad, positive or negative, it does not matter. What matters is that we need to focus on our blessings. You know that saying a blessing in disguise? That is what this post is about. We can say that when things are going bad it it is a blessing in disguise. That leads me into the first quote of this post by Oscar Wilde. He says “What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessing in disguises.” So when we think of something as bitter or bad or negative it is actually disguised as a blessing or something good.

I could go on and on about this topic but I will conclude by sharing one last quote and this poem to end this year of 2022. Manisha Shrestha Bundela says “Hard times are often blessings in disguise. Let go and let life strengthen you. No matter how much it hurts, hold your head up and keep going. This is an important lesson to remember when you’re having a rough day, a bad month, or a crappy year. Truth be told, sometimes the hardest lessons to learn are the ones your spirit needs most. Your past was never a mistake if you learned from it. So take all the crazy experiences and lessons and place them in a box labeled ‘Thank You.’” And with that I wish you all a merry Christmas, happy holidays and a happy new year. See you next year!

Good Blessings

I tumbled headfirst yet I still keep
My footing on stable ground.
The light was there as I was deep
In the darkness. I was crowned
With so many blessings even as
The blessings turned ugly and had
Thorns, but my foot was on the gas
Pedal going through all the bad
Patches and weeds trying to slow
Me down. I held my head high
As the constant ebb and flow
Was trickling. Saying goodbye
Was right there on my tongue,
But the blessings kept coming
And made me forever young.
I was walking instead of running
Towards everything I was once
Afraid of. Nothing is diminishing
My spirits or keeps me from the suns
As I am one step closer to finishing.