Old Drama

Remember when I talked way back when about leaving things behind? Well… one of those things that we have to leave behind is old drama. I do not know about you all, but I got teased relentlessly throughout middle school and high school. Those people who teased me, I do not associate myself with them anymore or at least I try not to. The worst thing is that they pretend to be your friend and do not remember that they treated you terribly back then. Yes, I am a person who loves drama, but that only comes in the form of theatre and performance drama. Trust me, I have dealt with drama, especially coming from a huge family, especially on my mom’s side. Someone is always talking about someone or not speaking to someone or spreading rumors. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? Sounds like high school all over again. Please, I know we are back in high school with this bullshit, pardon my language. Two things I will not tolerate; those are fake people and old drama.

That brings me into my next point of combing the two. I do not have the time, nor the patience to be dealing with those kinds of people. That brings me to this…which is best explained in this quote. “Sometimes those who don’t socialize much aren’t anti-social, they just have no tolerance for drama and fake people.” The worst assumption that people can make about me and people who are very similar in this regard is that we are anti-social. We still deal with people, just not those who are trying to bring us down and I will take more about the type of people we should be around in a different post…later down the road. That is why I only associate myself with some people from school, especially middle school and high school. That brings me into my next quote. “Drama just does not just walk into your life. Either you create it, invite it, or associate it.” In other words, do not let drama come into your life. It will give you headaches and things you do not want in the long run.

I know that I keep telling people this, but walk away. However, this time I am saying to walk away from drama. You should never try to associate yourself with drama. That brings me into my next quote which says “Real people avoid drama. They know their time is too precious. and choose not to waste it on unimportant people.” Sometimes I should take my own advice. Do not walk right into drama either. Those people who create drama thrive off of it, so do not give them that satisfaction. I just wanted to thank an old friend of mine from middle school, Ms. Sareena, who inspired this poem. You taught me a valuable lesson of never entertaining or being fooled by old drama. The best thing to do is to extend an olive branch and forgive. However, if they do not take it and want to bring up old drama, then walk away. Keep walking and never look back. I hate to be harsh, but those people do not deserve to be in your life. Cheers and remember that you should try to live your life as drama free as possible.

Leave the Drama Behind

Do not be fooled by the old
Drama and by people who think
They know you. They acted cold
Towards you while they wink
At you now, thinking that you are still
Friends. Darling, they are dumb
Enough to want to catch up and fill
The space with stories, but some
People never change. They want
The gossip and the latest scoop,
Not knowing that every taunt
Still echoes. Go ahead and snoop
Because you have nothing to hide.
In fact you have been way more
Successful while they want to ride
With you to the top. They swore
To be your friend, but they
Have become masters at telling
Lies. Never let them get their way
And become manipulators. Swelling
With pride is their way of being
Secretly envious. They want your
Life because they are finally seeing
They are going nowhere fast. Before
You let them watch you fail, succeed
So hard that they have to doubt
Themselves. You will find no need
To satisfy them. Their drought
Is your garden, watered with hunger
And motivation to live above
The drama. You are not any younger,
Living in a world lacking love
And respect because those people
Will still love you, but you also find
Forgiveness under the same steeple.
Leave the hurt and scars behind
Where they belong. Right their
Wrongs even when they are
Far from being sorry. Clear the air
And leave it at that. Be a bright star.

Dealing With the Players

I am going to apologize ahead of time because I know that this is a topic that I am sure a lot of people are tired of hearing about, but I am going to talk about it anyways and I am sorry if I offend people or if any of this comes across as cruel. It is a subject that is important to me and should be important to everybody (especially the girls and women here because we deal with it on a daily basis). That topic is guys who are players (I am not talking about guys who play sports like hockey, baseball, basketball, etc.). These are guys who are smooth in terms of knowing what to do and what to say around women. I am sorry to say that these guys do not care about other people because they only care about themselves and their egos.

They manipulate women and try to (and for the most part succeed) get what they want. They are selfish and sometimes insecure. Trust me, I know this stuff because I have dealt with a guy like this before back when I was in college. Let us call him A (the same guy I talked about when I went to my friend’s wedding back in May). He has changed now, but he treated me so badly when we were in school together. We were on and off again for about 2 years before it all ended. Sure, he treated me pretty good some of the time and a lot of the time he treated me pretty terribly. I ended up getting hurt, but I am glad that it ended before it got super out of hand. The problem was that I kind of knew he was a player. I heard all these stories about him and other girls. In the end, I chose to ignore what people were saying and I pretended like everything was okay, but in the end, none of it was ever okay. I did not deserve to be treated that way. Of course, at the time I did not know who I was dealing with and in fact, before those experiences with A, I never dealt with someone like him before.

I am bringing this up because I had to talk through with my BFF Marcia (I will not go too much into detail, I promise) about a situation she was dealing with that brought up memories with A. She would be telling me about these things with that guy and it would remind me of A (in fact they could be twins or friends in real life). I gave her advice and told her that she should not be wasting her time on this guy (I know that she deserves someone better). The last thing I want to happen to her is to see her hurt. It sucks, but that type of guy would never care about us or how we feel. Let them deal with whatever they are dealing with and leave them alone. In the end, they are not worth our time and energy. I wrote this poem for my BFF Marcia, but this is for all the girls and women across the word who deal with these types of guys on daily basis. Cheers!

And to those guys who this post is directed towards, I hope that you know that you are doing yourself and girls you hurt a disservice. I hope that you gain a new perspective and realize that you are not only hurting yourself, but you are hurting girls who (for the most part) do not deserve it. I am also leaving this poem and quote for you. “Dear Players: Go ahead and play your deceitful little games – lying and manipulating women to get laid – because that’s the only way to get them interested. Maybe you’ll have a different perspective when you’re wiping the tears off your daughter’s face…because she dated a man like you.” (Charles J. Orlando) I really hope that would not take you that long to figure out what you are doing wrong. Take a look at yourself and think about what you should do to change. We are not play things and in the end it really hurts (especially our hearts). I hope that all the guys and girls take what I have to say to heart (no pun intended) because although these types of situations make good writing material, we would rather not see everybody getting hurt because it is painful.

Better Things

He is saying all the right things
And he is making all the right moves,
But you somehow know in
Your heart that he is doing the
Same thing to all the other
Girls too. It is not your fault
And it certainly is not their fault
That he is charming. He is a player
Because he has done this before.
He says that he will change,
But both you and the other girls
Know that will never happen.
Do not be fooled by his
Old fashioned ways or by
The way he treats you
Nicely because he only
Wants one thing. He wants
His fill of you and then
He will be done, leaving you
Heartbroken. I do not want
To see you hurt because
I know that you deserve better.
You deserve more than
Someone who only wants your body.
He will want your mind, body,
And everything else in between.
Although you are hurt now,
At least you know. So I hope
That you do what every strong
Girl does, hold your head up
And keep moving on to
Better things.

Hello world!

One of my first loves in life was poetry. I remember when I first started writing poetry when I was at Willard Middle School. I first started writing poetry when I had Mr. Evans for English class in 6th grade. The two poems I remember writing were “My Green Eyes” and “Standing Tall.” It wasn’t until 8th grade that I realized that writing poetry is something I wanted to do. I always credit my 8th grade English teacher, Mr. Rose for encouraging me to keep writing. I kept to myself a lot, especially through middle school and high school. I felt like people didn’t always understand me because I can come off as shy and reserved. Other times I could be crazy and silly but that’s just who I am much like how writing poetry is a part of who I am. That’s why I always connected with poetry. It was like writing in a journal or taking photos for other people. That’s always the best way for me to express myself. It was an art form, but more personalized. If people wanted to know who I am or how I’m feeling or what I’m thinking about all they have to do is read my work.

I don’t always like sharing my work with other people but I do share them with people I trust. When I write poetry I feel like there’s no judgment and there’s nothing better than writing pen or pencil to paper. I almost always carry around some type of journal to write, even if it’s just the start or an idea for a poem I have running through my mind at that moment. Or if I don’t have a journal or paper I write in the note section on my iPhone. It comes in handy because I don’t always know when an idea will strike. Whenever I share something with a friend or a family member they almost always say I have a knack for it. That’s why I like sharing my work because I know how much I connect with my own work, but I know other people might have a connection to it too.

That’s how I came up with this idea to start a blog. I know that we’re all different, but sometimes we all have common threads. I’m not here to judge anybody or to change anybody’s beliefs or values. However, I do believe that we all need something to put our minds at ease and to realize that we’re not as different as we think we are. Hence the title “Messy Ties” because I’m always interested in the connections we have with other people and the different types of relationships we have throughout our lives, whether they’re romantic, friendships or “family” relationships. When looking up the definition of “relationship” online at dictionary.com I came across this: [a relationship is] “the way in which two or more people, groups, countries, etc., talk to, behave toward, and deal with each other.” Another definition of relationship is the following as well: [a relationship is] “the way in which two or more people or things are connected.”

Another reason why I wanted to do this blog because it’s the New Year. One of my new year’s resolutions was to try something new and that’s what I’m doing with this blog. I’m trying something new but I’m also stepping outside of the box. So this is my sharing with you, enjoy!! I’m also sharing a poem or two with you.